it's taking me a while to work through, but i'm currently reading and enjoying "being wrong: adventures in the margin of error" by kathryn schulz. it's surprisingly good (i think i have been realizing lately how much of a feat it is to make anything actually good, not that i didn't expect this book in particular to be good), though at times dense enough in an every-sentence-could-be-a-pull-quote sort of way that it takes me a long time to get through it.
it's a perfect time to be reading it, because being in the first serious relationship of my life, i've been wrong more times in the past year than in recent memory before that. i've also been right more times than in recent memory!
basically, it's the most time i've spent with another human being in perhaps the last decade. experiencing so much with one person means we're constantly negotiating our understanding of the past and the present—not in a super intense way, but little things like "how much milk is currently in the fridge" and "what country were we in two months ago again?" stuff that's either constantly changing (like the presence or lack of milk in the fridge) or that's out of view of the present moment and requires recalling in order to determine specific details.
very often we're on the same page, but the sheer amount of little moments like this means now and again we are not on the same page, which usually means one of us is wrong—which can feel very bad!
while living alone prior to being with my fiancé, reality was a one-person residence: i was experiencing most things alone, and thus not checking my work with another person basically ever. relatedly, at that time i also took feedback much harder in general, because it wasn't often that i received any. i had a hard time being wrong; it either made me defensive or question my own judgment, and honestly sometimes both.
reading "being wrong" makes me feel a bit saner for my strong reactions to being informed of my errors, and also gives quite an optimistic and accepting view of error in general. i highly recommend it!
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